Certain Romance

Well oh they might wear classic Reeboks
Or knackered Converse
Or tracky bottoms tucked in socks
But all of that's what the point is not
The point's that there ain't no romance around there
And there's the truth that they can't see
They'd probably like to throw a punch at me
And if you could only see them, then you would agree
Agree that there ain't no romance around there

You know, oh it's a funny thing you know
We'll tell 'em if you like
We'll tell 'em all tonight
They'll never listen
Cause their minds are made up
And course it's all okay to carry on that way

And over there there's broken bones
There's only music, so that there's new ringtones
And it don't take no Sherlock Holmes
To see it's a little different around here

Don't get me wrong, oh there's boys in bands
And kids who like to scrap with pool cues in their hands
And just cause he's had a couple of cans
He thinks it's alright to act like a dickhead

Don't you know, oh it's a funny thing you know
We'll tell em if you like
We'll tell em all tonight
They'll never listen
Cause their minds are made up
And course it's all okay to carry on that way

But I said
No! Oh no!
Well you won't get me to go!
Not anywhere, not anywhere
No I won't go
Oh no no!

Well over there there's friends of mine
What can I say, I've known 'em for a long long time
And yeah they might overstep the line
But I just cannot get angry in the same way
Not, not in the same way
Not in the same way
Oh no, oh no no

-Arctic Monkeys

watch and listen

YES!

So haven't posted in awhile don't care this is good. read it if you care to I liked it a lot.

http://www.nme.com/photos/50-incredibly-geeky-facts-about-arctic-monkeys/211085/1/1

SBA and it's okay

So yeah this week we had the delightful SBA testing, which I like to call BSA (and that doesnt stand for boyscouts of america). Anywayz it was actually a really great time and I got a lot of lolz out of the experience. Yeah it's a waste of time and money but it's not my problem. This week was almost like a vacation and went by rather quickly. I like to hear kids complain for it just makes me feel better about where I'm at. So yeah. I had a lot of time on my hands and didn't really feel in the moood for reading, so I wrote some rhymes. Warning: they're just for fun and not seriously good, just like they should. Well here you go, hope you're ready for the show. I know. bro.

My Name Is Emily

Don't mind me

My name is Emily

I got slick brown hair

And a secret evil lair

I'm short and expensive

But never quite defensive

Cuz I know Im always right

Hey you wanna fight?

No Im just kidding

My words are always skiddin

Out of my control

Gosh Im on a roll

Sickest sister in the hood

What Im sayins alwayz good

If you want to sit and listen

What all that Ive been spitten

Then come and join my crew

We eat green chile stew.

Olivia

Theres just somethin about Olivia

And lately I cant get enough of her

Shes cute and funny

And I hear she likes hunny

Cuz shes a little bear

With her short brown hair

Shes got hips that swing

When shes doin her thing

Making those fraps

Not givin a crap

When it comes down to it

She knows shes a hit

With those dark brown eyes

That never tell lies.

SBA

The SBA, more like the BS of A

Thats what Ive been doin, all stinkin day

These kids are so stupid, Im surprised this is real

But I keep my cool, its not a big deal

Sweatpants no makeup

Thats how I did wake up

Stylin for testing

Its really the best thing

Got a smile on my face

Cuz Im eatin some cake

No worries in the skies

Only cute butterflies.

Maddie and I (so this one's not quite finished)

See Ive got this bro

Her name is maddie

I call her a hoe

Cuz we got the same daddy.

Were as fly as can be

With our hair all a mess

Just wait and youll see

When we put on a dress.

Windows rolled down

Sunglasses on

We rip through this town

Until we are gone.

The skies are always brighter

When we come into sight

Becuz were sicker than your mother

And we love to fight.

Nails are always shiny

With lips never dull

We can be rather sassy

When were talkin to a fool.

Her hair may be long

And mines pretty short

But were both rather strong

And we make mean retorts.

Hope I got some lolz out of yalls. But I dont care if not, cuz I know Im still hot.

Brain Pain

First I know the title is stupid but I really don't care. Lately, I have just been realizing something sort of maddening: You can never know what people are thinking. Trust me it's impossible.

For a while I thought I had a pretty good grasp on what other people thought but then I came to the realization that not everyone thinks like me. You can hear two people explain the same situation and just because they both were there doesn't mean anything. The perception of body language or tone of voice can be so contrasting from person to person. And sometimes I assume what people are thinking by their mannerisms but really all I understand about their thought process is based on how I process things. Of which I have learned is very different compared to others. Now this can be rather annoying because you are always uncertain about what others perception is and you can never completely anticipate what they think. It's something that can become misleading when you jump to conclusions that are probably not true. Then it doesn't help that people can easily lie about what they think, so you have to question if what they say is even true or not. And see maybe you don't suspect for people to lie because you don't, but I know sometimes I do, so I assume others do too, when in fact they might not at all. You see my predicament. This also goes with how differently people interact with other people.

For example, I'm not one to necessarily voice my emotions much or because I know they don't really matter. But I have come to work on this because people need to know how much they are appreciated and see I think they can tell by they way I talk to them and what not, but that's not always the case. Because if I've established a friendship with someone, we're cool, in my mind I don't need to tell them they're great because they probably already know that. But I have come to realize that message isn't always transferred. So what do I do, just tell them flat out. For some this comes very naturally but for me it takes a lot. I feel like I'm telling people what they already know, but really they might not know at all. Or like the habit of saying sorry. With me I feel sorry about things, but if I know I shouldn't feel sorry about them, I won't voice my regrets. Because I know when I do, I'm just looking for a free compliment, like why are you sorry you're the best I love you, sort of stuff, knowing this is how I work, my assumption is that everyone thinks this way. So I get critical of others, but really they could just truly be sincere. But it also goes the same way because some people will think that I don't feel bad about a situation because I didn't apologize when they would have, so they think I don't appreciate them or I'm mean, but really I just didn't voice my apology. Since, that's not how I see things it's hard to relate. So I usually try to figure out who I need to apologize to and who I don't, but since I have no clue what their view is I'm left with no sense of what to do. I hope this makes sense, see it does to me.

Or like how some people are shy and others are more flirty and what not. Well, if you're shy and a flirty person talks to you, both of the perceptions would be contrasting. It's like in pride and prejudice with Jane and Mr. Bingley. Jane didn't even show her true emotions even to her own sister, and Mr. Darcey thought that Mr. Bingley liked her more that she liked him. Obviously not. It's all just so confusing. But also kind of exciting. It always keeps me on my toes. Never assuming but always trying, even though it's hopeless, to figure out the problem. Also, gives you a chance to mess with peoples perception of you. Especially at school, with people I know but will never really get to know very well, I can tell them what ever I want and they have no choice but to believe it. So sometimes I will tell people thing that just throw them off and it's funny, to me. I don't know, makes my life more interesting, and frankly I just get bored. That or joking around with people, not everyone has the same sense of humor as me, so half the time I come of as a jerk, but I didn't mean it. Does this mean I should stop making jokes in fear that I might hurt someones feelings, because they took it the wrong way. Or is my humor sincere to my personality and their opinion of me doesn't matter. I couldn't tell you, just a thought.

Then here is a biggie and I'm kind of scared to say it but in my support I'm pretty sure that the people, if any, who take the time to read this will understand, so I'm just going to say it. My view of posting things about God and the Bible on facebook is very different from others. From my understanding my relationship with God is between He and I, that's it. I also know that if I ever post about God, I am not mature enough to do it without corrupt motives. I know my goal would be in glorifying myself, by proclaiming to everyone I read my Bible that morning, or just that I am so spiritual and what not. So that is what goes through my head. I have a view that I really don't have to post on facebook to prove how my relationship with God is going and how 'spiritually mature' I am, because it's not about status (on facebook, skidding). I know that and the only person I need care about is God. I don't need to prove myself to anyone and especially not through stupid facebook and let them all know that I am super spiritual, I think you get the point. Now at first when I saw other people doing this I thought they saw it exactly how I did and I would become critical. But honestly I guess some people really are sincere and get excited and don't think anything of it. Then I think what if people suppose I'm backsliding or a 'bad christian' or something because I don't post a Bible verse everyday. To that I say, none of your business, just kidding, it's more like I don't care. But trust me I have thought about it a lot, unfortunately. So tell me what you think ;)

I honestly could go like how people interpert music differently, blah blah blah but I got stuff to do, not really. But this has just been on my mind. I think for the rest of my days I will just listen to music and walk, two of my favorite things to do. Happy Sunday.

I wrote a poem, blah

I'm not really one for writing poems or anything but this came out today when I was writing. I'm not trying to show off because I know I'm no poet but I guess I just wanted to get it out and share. Here it is:

Today

Today is bright and I'm worried about my future.

Everything is up in the air, while I'm stuck on the ground.

Ideals so far away, I wish i could just reach out and grasp.

My opinions are worth nothing, unless valued by something.

The ultimate, contently forever happy.

That's all we want, but what do we do.

Find someone who cares, if we can.

Try not to care ourselves, feels impossible.

Just care for myself, that doesn't help anyone.

I'm stuck in a rut, better go searching.

I know it's not very good but it really did a good job in portraying what I was thinking, which is nice.

Snoop Dogg

So I think this will sum everything up: I love Snoop Dogg. This past week I have read the autobiography of Snoop Do-doubleG. First of all, it's a great book. I love the way Snoop talks and it sounds almost exactly how him. So come on. He teaches you a lot about the hood and how it really is. Tha hood, had always been extremely foreign to me and my outlook on it was basically just like what the media said, which is hardly ever correct. So I got the dirt on what's really going down and it was all actually really interesting. I mean its knowledge that I will probs never really need... but what the heck it's cool.

Snoop :) has taught me a loty. Because the thing is, he's smart. Defs not book smart but he really knows what's going on. He has a way of putting things so that they make sense, because he's real. In the start of his book he said, "That's why I've got to stay real, to remember where I came from and where I'm going. See, I didn't get sent out on this mission with nothing to cover my a$$ in a crossfire. A powerful weapon has been put at my disposal. The truth." I mean how cool is that. (and I know that he cussed but I think you can maybe over look that to see what he is saying, and a least he is sincere, okay). The lessons that Snoop has aquired in his life and then shared, are things that he has learned on his own and honestly can testify to. He didn't hear someone say it or just kinda learned from everyone else around him, he honestly and throughly grasped these concepts all by himself. And that is something not many people do these days. Some people are all talk, and the things they preach are just what they have heard all their lives but never really experienced... now not with my man Snoop. Some of the things he wrote, I never really heard in my life, and trust me I've heard a lot of stuff (if ya know what I mean *wink).

For example, he explained why even rich white kids like rap... "Looking out at those happy white people, bumping to the beat, flashing their signs and singing along to my words, I'd have to ask myself, What are they getting out of all this? How is it that they can relate to hip-hop as strong as anybody as black as I am? What's the connection? (truth and being real)... Because little white kids living in gated communities across this country want to be down with the brothers in the 'hood. We represent something to them- a freedom their mama and daddy can't ever buy." Here's another classic. "Making money is the bomb, don't get me wrong. But there's another reason youngsters are turning to the gangsta life style. It's cool, fool. Am I telling you something you don't know? Then, straight up, you are a fool and a bigger one than I thought.... Gangs are cool. Drug dealers are cool. Pimps and players are cool." He tells you straight up. And right now I can already hear you saying well blah, blah, blah, I don't look up to those guys.. but here's a question would you ever for one second mess with any of them.. exactly. I didn't grow up in the ghetto or anything but even I can see why this makes sense. I also learned a lot of interesting terms. Like, in the hood they use the term scrilla to describe paper money, and everyone wants to get some scrilla. Then I learned a lot of different terms for weed, like chronic, indo, kush, or a blunt. Like I said when will I need to know this.. I'm not sure but it doesn't hurt, hopefully.

So, Snoop is a Christian. Now before you go crazy and point out the obvious like he doesn't live the part and he smokes weed blah blah blah, just listen. You don't get to say it, I'm not letting you, because I'm saving you from feeling bad later. And maybe you won't but just hear me out.. for Snoop's sake. He grew up on the streets, and that is an experience that anyone who is reading this has never had to experience I'm almost positive. The struggles that he has been through are so much worse than anything I've ever known, but you know, he never complains about his past and still loves his 'hood, Long Beach. Respect. He gave his life to God when he was sentenced to jail for selling rock (cocaine, I learned the lingo), and his experience was honestly something so sincere you knew it was God who revealed himself to him so if anything you can't judge him on that. As I read the way Snoop described it yeah I cried, it touched me that much. Because the thing is everyone needs God even Snoop Dogg (rhyme) and it is really up to God to reveal himself to people, I can tell that it was genuine. "But it's funny how God works His game. Just when you think you've got Him figured out, some blindside twist of fate makes you understand that you can't figure Him out. That's why He's God and you're whoever the hell you are. He calls the shots, makes the moves, and keeps it all in check. You're just along for the ride... God isn't interested in any chicken heads on His team. He's looking for those who can prove their talk by the way they walk. And that was a lesson I was about to learn the hard way". <- Snoop Dogg said that! He talks about God a lot throughout the book and even though he's not really a role model type, he has things figured out pretty well and it's all through what God has revealed to him personally. He really understands the concept of things happening on God's timing and that is something we tend to forget. God takes time and we have time and it's all done on His time. I could honestly go on and on but I'll save leave it up to you to read the book I guess, if you've read this far already.

I guess one of the biggest things that really became clear through this book is that the more you learn about someone and hear about where they came from, the harder and harder it becomes to dislike them. First, all I knew about Snoop was that he was a lolz dude and has some sick rhymes. Now I know all about his life and if anyone says anything bad about him I will fight you with my witt and words. But the same goes with anyone really, just how you fall in love with someone (I don't want to say fall in love, not love, love, but a lovable respect) is simply by learning more about them and confiding in them. And I think that's why it's so dangerous and humans feel so vulnerable opening up all the time, myself included. I'm kinda cautious when I give out information about myself or you know hear someone's life story, because it's almost inevitable you will fall in love with them. This kinda leads you to wonder about love how finding the right 'one'. Well then, again not everyone thinks like me so maybe this isn't true for you, but whatever. I guess what I'm trying to say is just don't be so hard on people because if you actually could see where they are coming from I'm sure you would feel stupid for being so mean in the first place. And celebrities included. Now I'm not saying that this is always the case or that you should only see the good in people but at least see the good and the bad together. Ehh. I don't know. You can do what you want but this is just something kinda nice to think about. I honestly could just go on and on but I'll stop here.

So cheers to Snoop Dogg: you are great.

P.S.: I really miss my book. I have been thinking about it a lot and the jerk who stole it but. WHATEVER. I just really want to make some pics for peeps so if you want one let me know. I have an idea for some cool shirts though, not like anyone cares or probs read this but it's just a thought. and a very nice thought indeed.

more hawt art

This is maddie and I's projected summer... under maddie's dress it a bikini I bought her once in a dream. hawt

Here is a valentine I made awhile ago.. it's cute... no it's creepy and was meant to be so.

ya wavves. enough said.

triangles

I have come upon a decision that I find to me very important to my life. I love triangles. I never really payed much attention to them but lately they have just made my life. Just think about it triangles... right!

All their angles add up to 180 degrees, all the time without fail. That's cool. Then, when drawing designs on graph paper, you can always add on to a triangle because all the sides are straight. then you can manipulate them in any way you want, like you can have it be short, wide, tall, skinny, anything and they always look good. How nice is that, a triangle that always looks good. See with squares and rectangles those just take too much to make them look good and either way they always look annoying. Then like diamonds or really any quadrilateral, always remind me of controlling women... gross huu.

Then triangles have a lolz instrument named after them, because it is one... the triangle. Seriously, this is the most joyous instrument, when heard you can't just help but laugh and anyone can play it. Or what about the bermuda triangle.. come on you have to admit it, that's cool. Well, then think about how many triangles you can fit inside a triangle without it encompassing another. There are three sides and three vertexes, didn't Jesus rise on the third day or what about the trinity... I don't know but that's nice. You can have love triangles and you can easily make triangles with your fingers. It takes two triangles to make the Jewish star... trippy. There's so many different kinds of triangles and there's tons of math to go behind all of it. You know anything that is related to math better be important to me, ya. Aren't the pyramids just a bunch of triangles and you can cut grilled cheese into triangles. Trust me I could go on...

haha as you can probably tell, I haven't had any profound thoughts lately. My life is becoming more and more simple and it's nice. I have a nice schedule that I follow and even though it's kinda bland I like it. I have good friend and a pretty family. so really I'm kinda set. what does this have to do with triangles.. I'm not quite sure, maybe I like them because they are simple but you can get a lot out of them and all I want is for my life to be so. sure ;)

clothes and music

Lately I have noticed a trend in the music I listen to and the influence it has on the way I dress. Like it's something I honestly have no control over. If I listen to certain music when I get ready in the morning, it effects every aspect of my ensemble. This all make sense though, in my mind.

For example, as I got ready this morning I listened to wavves, which has a very beachy, rock feel to it and well all I wanted to do was wear jean, a tshirt, and pink lip stick. So I did. The music inspired me I guess.

When I listen to ghetto, rap like, I don't know, Ludacris or Snoop Dogg, I tend to want to wear lots of gold. Shiny things that look very expensive, I guess that's what comes to mind when I listen to them... I'm not sure.

As I listen to jazz or classical records, all I want to where are little dresses and an apron. It brings out my domestic duties side and I feel like cleaning and baking and what not. hahaha maybe I should listen to it all the time.

Then, as I stream metal through my speakers.... Heck, all I want to wear is black. Yeah, then with like red accents or a graphic tee. I try to be metal, you know what I mean. I'll usually wear my black shoes and black pants then do like sparkle make up. I guess in my mind that's what metal is.

Now I'm not saying I follow these instincts all the time, but the it really does impact my attire more than I would like to admit. I think that musicians should start pairing up with different clothing companies more often, but not make it just like a one time deal. Like certain clothing companies should do lines of clothes based on certain bands or even songs. Then on the websites play the band and show you the clothes. Well that's what I'll do maybe some day... just you wait. that's all I got.

TUP duex

So as I promised, here is my writings on the second half of Trickle Up Poverty. So I have been done with this book for sometime I just kinda forgot I said I was going to blog about the end of it.. So yeah. Here you go I guess, for those who care.

So the last chapters focused on some of the things that really make me tick. So I enjoyed them highly. Mr. Savage seriously killed all these topics; with witt and the plain facts: Global Warming, Illegals, and Military. Seriously these were executed perfectly and I enjoyed it so much! I won't tell you everything I'll just cite some of my favorite quotes on these subjects. Let's go.

Global Warming:

"In 2006, Gore presented a global warming disaster scenario in his film, An Inconvenient Truth. With the skill of Freddy Krueger, Al butchered science on the big screen, bludgeoned the truth to a pulp, and scared the hell out of millions of unsuspecting dolts. His 'gore-fest' included the release of a book based on the same junk science used in his movie. The Hollywood lapdogs ate it up, handing Al an Academy Award for this so-called documentary- a real piece of fiction if ever there was one." (p. 156) Umm this is freakin great.

"Thank God there's an awakening as the Tea Party movement demonstrates. The resistance to what this president is doing to foist trickle up poverty on the middle class via Climategate is growing. I can only pray it's not to late to stop Obama's hate."(p. 186) He's talking about me :)

Illegals: this is one of those issues that I really don't understand the opposition. So if you could open my eyes so see why illegals aren't committing a crime, I will seriously listen.

"In the first place, someone in this country illegally is committing a crime. If you're an illegal alien, you're a criminal. Period. Beyond that, if you're in the country illegally and you commit another crime, it's a crime that could have, and should have, been prevented by more stringent enforcement of immigration laws." (p.200) RIGHT!

"A study conducted by Bear Stearns found that 'undocumented immigrants... hold approximately 12 to 15 million jobs in the Untied Sates (8% of the employed)". (p. 204) Um. Hello that's why unemployment is so high in America! haha I don't know.

Military:

"When you pull back the curratin and see the monstrous things Obama the Destroyer has done-and is doing-you realize this president, his agenda, and his policies are to be feared because he is putting the survival of a nation on the line". (p. 262) haha the Destroyer. yup.

"In other words, the Obama military establishment is running a damn PR campaign, not a war! They're more concerned about the cultural seeeensitivity that getting the job done-which is no way to win." (p.265) thank you Mr. Savage.

"In the words of General George S. Patton: 'No bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country.' Patton wouldn't be playing this peek-a-boo game with the Taliban swine. He wouldn't have hesitated using air power to flatten and pulverize that rat holes where these vermin hide. America needs more Patton.. and less patent leather." (p.269) Bad, but very true and hilarious.

So in conclusion. Buy the book I guess. I enjoyed it probably more than I should have, some of the stuff in here just amazed me. What I wrote isn't even the best stuff. You have to find that out for yourself ;)

its valentime!

Well it's valentines day.. what do you do.. wear red, pink and black (and brown because that's my favorite color). I just couldn't help but write a little somethin on the topic, yeah know, it's just the time to do it.

First of all, I really don't understand Valentines Day, especially when it comes to the advertising and the things sold on this special day. For example, wallgreens was selling big stuffed hearts with tennis shoes on them. That's gross! I would not like that if I were a girl, plus it's really creepy. I guess maybe for a joke, it could be romantic? I don't know. Also, people will buy cheep chocolate. That just never made sense to me. NO ONE WANTS GROSS CHEEP CHOCOLATE! haha it doesn't bother me that much but I wanted to be dramatic. Then why do kids pass out valentines to everyone in the class? who started that tradition? (I don't really want to know). I feel like valentines day is just an excuse to be romantic and flirty and get all your feelings out. something, whatever. Or it could be just a great day to be mean and break up with someone. haha that's mean.

Another thing I love is everyone being all proud that they are alone on valentines day. Especailly when they had never had it any other way. I mean you have been alone your whole life does it really matter that you're alone for this one day. I guess so. But then there are those who are all oh I don't care that I'm alone on valentines day but you secretly know that they just want someone to say oh you're alone want to be mine. haha I like noticeing that kind of stuff.

Well while were on the subject of love I guess I'll say a little something. I believe in love and I believe in marraige, especially for girls, it's just practical. I know I'm going to get married someday and I'm actually really excited about it (for good reasons) but that day is not in the near future and that's how I like it. I feel like people should just find someone that they can seriously spend the rest of their life with and commit to it. Because everyone (well of course not everyone) needs the security that comes with marriage and just knowing that you belong to someone, and not having to worry about being alone. Like us girls need to get married someday for the protection and security even money wise. And men need to get married so they can take care of their family and feel accomplished. Girls be girls and boys be boys PLEASE! (know your gender and you're good). See there comes a point where you just naturally progress in life, and it all comes in time. Some sooner that others. But it's something that you shouldn't worry about, it will all come in time. I mean still be careful with who you chose and all, and whatever you don't rush things, but don't stress that your single at [insert age here], calm down, it's your fault your single anywayz... just kidding.

"It's Mr. Latenight Luda and I like to flirt."

Happy Valentines Day <3

respect

I have come to realize something: I respect expensive things, even expensive people. Our society is practically based on money and fame and to reach that, is actually quite impressive. Now I'm not saying that they are my idols or anything but seriously to become so famous and well known is pretty cool. I also really respect pretty people. They are seriously my favorite, even if their not very famous, it's just amazing how good looking some people are.

For clothing stores and what not, I can really admire those that can sell their stuff for so much and people buy it. Especailly those big brand names. Even though I can't buy their stuff, other people can and someone is making tons of money off of it. I look up to them in the sense that they did it right, and they really do know what they are doing. See you really have to know the market and have everything down to make that kind of money and fame. Or even all the rappers or big music artists out there. They know the system and to appeal to so many people and make so much money is just crazy. Like Lil Wayne, Nicki Miniaj, Ludacris (I know he's not the biggest but I like him), Drake, Jay-Z, and even Beonce, they are all stinkin rich and everyone knows them. And don't forget about Justin Beiber, most viewed video on youtube with half a billion views. Now I know that their music isn't good, so what, hello they're all making million$$$.

Also I like it when people do stuff just because they can. Like Mukest Amban, Indias richest man. He is building a 27 floor house, over 400,000 square feet, the richest home, just because he can. I like that, I mean isn't that how we got all the historic wonders of today, the Palace of Versillas, yeah. When people spend their money they can create something historic, I want to do something like that some day. Some poeple don't see it as fair to judge someone's sucess by the amount of money they make but I honestly think it's pretty accurate. It's no wonder the some of the richest people in the world are also the smartest, they deserve it. Then people will go as far to say that it's not fair that people are praised because they are smart. Well, hello it's the smart people that made the system work that way! haha I don't know, maybe I'm just saying that because I'm smart, just kidding.

Also, pretty people. It really bothers me when people hate people just for being pretty, especially girls. I mean come on they can't help it that they're beautiful, and in my opinion it's a gift. This just makes me happy, seeing pretty people.

I don't know I guess it all just comes down to this: I aspire to be someone who knows what they're doing and makes money. haha

Ma Soeur

It's February... love.. oh yeah!

Well my sister is doing really cool things on her blog so if you haven't checked it out... please do right now.

www.koolkidnation.blogspot.com

She's posting something new related to love, everyday for this month.

So in the spirit of my sister I thought I would post this poem for her. I wrote it like a year ago, December 9, 2009, to be exact but it has been in my head a lot lately.

Note: It is in french... stupid french... simple senctences because I am really bad at it, but I get by. Also, this isn't real poetry, I haven't really given poetry a chance, it always makes me feel weird. I don't know I could be good at it, most likely not. It's really short too.

Ma soeur,

jolie et petite

Elle fete, elle aller au cafe, elle danse

J'adore my soeur

Madeline.

Ha told you so. Anyways that's my cotribution to love and poetry.

chill out

So for the past couple day's New Mexico has had a total break down and honestly I think it's great, for me anyways. I know that people have been running out of gas, which is really bad, but they cancelled school and I'm selfish. So the title "chill out" entails that it has been cold, but also alludes to what I will be discussing in these up coming sentences.

Well, on these days off, I have been doing a whole lot of nothing. Nothing that matters or is to any extent productive. And honestly, I have been just fine with it. Usually, I'm like aahaha I need to get out of the house and do stuff with people, I'm missing out on everything, blah blah blah. But not this time! I stayed at home, hung out with my brother, played xbox, played computer games, didn't do my homework, and even forgot to eat many times. I don't know maybe I was sick and I just didn't notice, I couldn't tell ya. But what I learned from this is that I think everyone should just calm down. chill out, you could say ;) I has done me wonders.

It's surprisingly nice to just be kinda selfish in the right way. I'm not saying totally selfish, but just don't worry about what everyone else is doing around you, just be happy and comfortable with what you are doing. Then also don't jump to conclusions in your mind. I notice that when I stay home by myself I start thinking wicked fast about everything on the planet. And that doesn't get me anywhere, I jump to conclusions about stuff that doesn't matter and it just starts ruining my day. So what do you do? Find something that will occupy your time, for a long time. Trust me hobbies are very important. It doesn't have to be productive either. It has to be something that you get so caught up in and concentrated on that you forget to eat, that's when you know it's a hobby. But don't let drama be you're hobby, that's just unhealthy, even though it seems to be the most common one. So just find something that you like to do and be happy. You don't have to be happy but at least relax a little bit. And you really don't have to worry about everyone else, they're fine.

You could also get a blog, you can tell that's one of my hobbies because none of my post have any real purpose other than occupying some time in a manner other people can hopefully enjoy.

I don't know, here is something else. If you are really stressed and what not, most of the time when you over think things the end result is not very logical and just trying to talk to someone about it just a mess, because you know you're not making much sense, or at least that's how it goes down for me. Hmm... maybe that never happens to you and I just sound crazy, whatever it was your choice to read this, if anyone does. Besides the point. Advice: one of my favorite things to do is just ignore your emotions! I'm serious. Just ignore them and realized that you feel this way but just don't recognize your emotions as true and what ever you do don't feed off of them. You will just set your head spinning and that's no good. Because when you are all emotional you definitely don't think straight, so just recognize that you're emotional and ignore them. Maybe not everyone can do this but you can always try.

So everyone just relax. Including myself.

music

I realized that I haven't really talked about music much on this thing. Let me tell you why. I kinda hate talking about my music choices with others. I hate it when people that annoy me, like the same bands that I do. So when they ask who my favorite band is... I lie. I know this is really weird and may come off mean, but it's true. Also, I don't like it when people say that they like a band just because I do. Trust me this doesn't happen often but when it does again I lie. It's a really bad impulse I have and probably should be broken. So tonight that is what I'm going to do.

My all time favorite band is.....(drum role).....(even though no one cares).... the arctic monkeys.

Yep they are perfect. Their music can change my mood in any way possible. I haven't really ever liked a band this much ever. They are uber talented and not to mention absolutely gorgeous. Okay, so the name sounds stupid, I understand that, but trust me there is nothing stupid about them. There is really no good way to describe their sound so here just listen:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xkCuDftNf0c (please click, you seriously won't regret it)

I hope you can see why and it better be for the right reasons, just kidding. And if not that's really okay. But for me I love them and I mean it.

my finger!

haha so here is my latest drama. (I know this isn't a big deal but not much happens so I gotta do with what I have). So on Saturday, it was lovely, great day, climbed some hills. So what might you be asking made this day so dramatic.. Well it is what happened when I came home. There was a burglar/murder waiting for me, the door was wide open and a gun was pointed at me. I was luckily caring my pocket knife, which I took with me to the mountains, and in self defense I killed him before he could even put a finger on me! His last words were "...." silence. VICTORY! (I lied).

No really what happened is I lost. I was sewing a skirt for my sister. I carefully put all the planets into that skirt and it was almost done. Then in a split second I was about to sew in the last details, I got distracted, turned my head, pressed the peddle of the machine down then.... the needle went into my finger! I scream, I cry and I become very angry. Okay, this was one of the stupidest things I have done in a long while and I'm mad it had to come to this. But I guess I learned my lesson.. na there is no lesson to be learned, nice thought though.

I know the first one sounds better.

love that

Okay so this week we had to take the tri-yearly, dba english testing. Awful I know. Anyways, in the test I read about one to the funniest poems, ever. I was about love and it took me a second to get over the fact that this was for real. I later went home in search of this lolerbear, love poem. I couldn't find it, however, in my search I found some other cute poems. Here they are.

"The Colour of My Love"

I'll paint a sun to warm your heart
Knowing that we'll never part.
I'll draw the years all passing by
So much to learn, so much to try.

I'll paint my mood in a shadow blue,
Paint my soul to be with you.
I'll sketch your lips in shaded tones,
Draw your mouth to my own.

I'll trace a hand to wipe your tears
And trace a look to calm your fears.
A silhouette of dark and light
To hold each other oh so tight.

I'll paint the stars in the evening sky,
Draw the light into your eyes,
A touch of love, a touch of grace,
To softly fall on your moonlit face.

And with this ring our lives will start,
Let nothing keep our love apart.
I'll take your hand to hold in mine,
And be together through all time.

(this is the love of a true artist.)

"Circle of Love"

I remember how I loved the way a woman smells

She's just showered and walks by pulling you in to her

Wondering how she would respond to you.

I remember all the girls I lied to.

Just to get close to that scent.

All the hearts that I left scarred because I loved

the feel of the skin as I rub and encourage my sins

While not caring that my love wasn't true.

(this one is rather creepy, he's sniffing girls.... you can guess the author.)

"A Love Song"

Let me sing you a love song
About what I feel in my heart;
Butterflies can't find nectar
Whenever we're apart.

You're a flower in bloom.
In the dark, in the gloom,
It's you who brightens my day.
How many ways do I need you?
Every day, every way, come what may.

(oh butterflies... they are love I guess.)

I hope you laughed out loud, I did when I read these. And also yes all the colored words were in a different color on purpose. I know what I'm doing. Goodnight <3>

tonight

I want to go to the mountains. To an idealistic log cabin, where it's cold and I don't have to do anything or think about anything important. This sounds perfect to me right about now. Just to breath in the crisp, fresh air. With snow and a blanket wrapped around me. The unique silence is all around and theres a candle burning. I wish! Someday, someday, but sadly someday's not today and someday might just be too late. Maybe I'll just run away to the mountain's, not Albuquerque mountains but real mountains. Tonight.

lolz art

Since my book was stolen I haven'tposted

any art but now it's time. I made these pictures on my computer out of pure boredom, I call this collection lolz art. Enjoy.

($layer \m/)

Madison really likes learning.

This is and advertisement for my sister.

computer games

Just in: a new post woah!

So for the past couple days my sister and I have been reminiscing about childhood and what not. Anyways, one of our favorite parts is the computer games we used to play for days on end. They were seriously the best computer, children games in the world. Let me tell you, first there was amazon trail. So the object of the game is to make it to the end of the amazon, you're on a boat, ya. So you're sailing down with your guide and along the way you have to make stops and talk to the locals and fish and what not. It took a really long time to finally get down and you meet a lot of really interesting people. I remember some parts were really scary and we used to get so caught up in it, but to say the least it was great.

The other wonderful childhood joy was called spy fox. In this one you're this fox and the point of the game is to solve some sort of mystery. Like in one you had to stop this evil poodle from ruining the ozone layer with her evilll hairspray! Do you realize how intese that is, I mean come on the out come of the world is at the tip of you're fingers. This game also made the best sound effects and the fox talked funny. As a kid these games felt so hard but really they weren't. It was pretty much like a giant puzzle that you had to solve and most of the time, solved several times. I loved it.

My sister and I are planning to buy these games soon and I'm honestly really excited. I have a lot of time on my hands and this would be a great way to spend my good ol' time. Also this will bring the good parts of my childhood to mind (I'm not saying that there were ever any bad childhood experiences, no). Also in case you were worried, they only cost like a couple buck$ so it won't be a waste of money either.

TUP Everyone

So before I get into the whole TUP business I wanted to complain. I recently learned that a starbucks double shot has in fact not two shots but five. Sadly, I learned this a little too late, how was I supposed to know, I guess it could be common sense but I just didn't think. So yeah I had a starbucks double shot venti thing and currently feel horrible and have been for the past hour or so. My head is spinning and everything just feels aweful, even my thought process. So yeah I decided to blog while I could type really fast, which I'm doing right now. Let me just say I learned my lesson and I will just stick to the calm tea for a while.

Anyways let's get down to business. So what is TUP you maybe asking yourself. Well, let me tell you. TUP stands for Trickle Up Poverty, which is a book written by none other than Michael Savage, my favorite. I picked it up like a week ago and so far it is just great. It is everything you would expect and more. It's just the perfect mix of humor, logic, and a little bit of justified conspiracy. I love it. Here is the opening paragraph: "President Obama is like a destructive child who takes apart a priceless watch that was carefully passed down to him. Without regard for the value of what he hold, he recklessly scatters the pieces on the floor and then can't put them back together again. Failing to learn from his mistakes, this destructive child moves on to another room where he finds another watch to take apart. Once again, he cannot put the pieces back together. That doesn't stop him from tearing apart yet another costly timepieces until all that's left are the pieces of discarded, functionless watches lying at his feet." Hahaha it's funny but so true, great use of the rhetorical strategy analogy Mr. Savage.

Another favorite: "Man may be the only living being on earth that will rely on others to feed it- and gives nothing to others in return!". The point of this book is to stop Obama's attack on our borders, economy, and security and trust me after reading just the first chapter you will see that yes in fact we are under attack. You will see Obama's Marxist-Leninest agenda and why you should fear it so much. See you may not think so yet but Mr. Savage does know his stuff he has studied the works of Marx and Lenin for almost forty years to simply know their flaws and yes he does make some wild claims but he has support to back them up. This is the kind of stuff that you don't hear about in the news and probably never will. See what I love about Mr. Savage is that he is real and also very blunt. The terms he uses to describe people are just priceless and make me lol for real.

"Entire books have been written about Karl Marx, Vladimir Lenin, and Joseph Stalin, the Three Stooges of Communism. These men thought they had invented a better economic and philosophical system upon which to build a nation. All three couldn't have been more mistaken. Like their TV and film counterparts, Marx, Lenin, and Stalin were always working on a new angle to pull the wool over the sheeple's eyes- although their results were far from a laughing matter". If you didn't catch it sheeple is a cross between people and sheep, get it.

Heres what he said about Pelosi:

"We all know speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi is a bit off. This woman is so intoxicated with her own power that she runs around Washington like a despot. Don't get me wrong. My intention isn't to tarnish Madam Pelosi's reputation. She's already done a first-class job of that. Her behavior speaks for itself..... If Pelosi had as much passion for killing al-Qaeda as she has for killing our freedom of choice with her healthcare bill, the Democrat's approval rating would have soared 30 percent over night. Her passion is misplaced. It's backfiring."

So should you buy TUP, is it worth the money? YES! or you could just borrow my copy, but I'd want it back. I haven't finished it quite yet, but when I do I will let you all know how the rest is, so far I give it an A+.

Blah

Blah. I hate school. ya. But here's the thing I'm smart, I'm not trying to be prideful but I know I am. I feel as though I really am wasting my time and more than ever I am absolutely bored in almost all my classes. I wish I could just graduate already and then I can at least go to college but no I'm stuck for another year and a half, learning the same exact stuff over and over. Or just learning useless information. I know everyone says this but lately it's been really bothering me. I feel like I could be doing a million other things with my time that would be way more productive but I can't, I'm stuck. And the only reason that I'm doing well in school is because I have a underlying need to care about school. Which also bothers me, it's like something that I can't help, it's just there. I mean public school is great, ya know it's free! But what I think is funny is that schools try to focus on individuality, and act like they really care but they don't. They think that all the kids are stupid.

Maybe if they tried they would realize that there are a lot of kids out there like me that are just wasting their time, stuck and bored in high school. And teachers will tell you not to waste your time, when they are wasting yours. This all makes me really mad. Like I know that everything has a time and what ever but really. And it's all those stupid kids that hold back everyone else. It kinda creeps me out in a way to think of how this all came to be. It also makes me angry but I just don't want to do it anymore. If I wouldn't loose scholarships and what not I would definitely drop out and get my GED, heck I could of gotten that thing freshman year. This also makes me want to work hard and hopefully test out of my math and english classes in college and do well on my ACT so I get lots of money. Yeah from all of this, I will just make it my goal to make a bunch of money. I very well understand that this sound vain and it is but I might as well, if I can.

No no no

NnNnnNooOOOoOOOooOOOoooo! I'm so angry right now. I don't want to go back to school with everything that is in me. It's absolutely awful, just the thought gets my blood boiling. I hate school so much and starting drivers ed doesn't help one bit. Bla Bla plus I have to go to school on birthday this year. That never ever happens to me, but it will this year, and I will get to enjoy the awkward birthday wishes. Actually, I might not now that I think about it, I'm really good a keeping quiet and private at school ;)

So yeas I am behind in life and have started drivers ed, finally. It is the most boring class in the world, three hours everyday for two weeks, you have to be kidding me. I can hardly stand two days! Also, I haven't even spoke to anyone in my class yet besides the teacher, they're all little sophomores and I could really care more. But hey gotta love red asphalt. And not to mention truck drivers getting paid $500 to talk to you about their personal life and give marriage advice. I'm just glad to have my permit and finally drive, great birthday present. I really am thankful though.